








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 127 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 19 matches | ||
| Wingman | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Faceit | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




55 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1866 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,628 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1993 | 35% |
| Smokes | 1678 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1058 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 899 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $778,036 of utility $184 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 484 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kmxAAA | 64% | 14 |
| #2 | Nat | 58% | 73 |
| #3 | Pladom | 56% | 104 |
| #4 | maxou regular sexy en javelot | 55% | 118 |
| #5 | oug oug gaga oug | 54% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nat | 11 | 0.0074 |
| #2 | maxou regular sexy en javelot | 6 | 0.0024 |
| #3 | Fäyatex | 6 | 0.0042 |
| #4 | brakmar_DX | 3 | 0.0067 |
| #5 | Pladom | 2 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pladom | 243 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #2 | Nat | 160 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #3 | Fäyatex | 90 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #4 | kmxAAA | 39 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #5 | maxou regular sexy en javelot | 30 | 0.01 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nat | +2.55 | 87 | 57 |
| #2 | Pladom | +1.69 | 76 | 64 |
| #3 | Renault T Euro 6 480 | +1.46 | 84 | 63 |
| #4 | Fäyatex | +0.41 | 72 | 58 |
| #5 | maxou regular sexy en javelot | +0.14 | 69 | 23 |





