








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 259 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 60 matches | ||
| Premier | 59 matches | ||
| Wingman | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 38 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1058 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,988 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 759 | 19% |
| Smokes | 1375 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 1066 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 788 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,123,184 of utility $322 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 15 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tigibus | 47% | 120 |
| #2 | Papalive | 46% | 135 |
| #3 | Noether | 42% | 78 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tigibus | 47% | 120 |
| #2 | Papalive | 46% | 135 |
| #3 | Noether | 42% | 78 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Papalive | 7 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | Noether | 7 | 0.0041 |
| #3 | Tigibus | 4 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tigibus | 439 | 0.17 | 11 min |
| #2 | Papalive | 428 | 0.15 | 13 min |
| #3 | Noether | 72 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tigibus | +2.29 | 65 | 73 |
| #2 | Papalive | +0.62 | 34 | 72 |
| #3 | Noether | -1.78 | 50 | 43 |
| #4 | Kwaftt | -2.89 | 22 | 51 |





