










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1 achievement has been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
240 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 854 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 12 | 1% |
| Smokes | 148 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 501 | 59% |
| Molotovs | 193 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $191,829 of utility $126 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 88 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | Whorus Heresy | 21% | 24 |
| #12 | (WTH) HoneyBadger | 20% | 15 |
| #13 | Mellow | 18% | 11 |
| #14 | Dont Shoot! | 17% | 23 |
| #15 | exel | 0% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kapk | 3 | 0.0036 |
| #2 | Theeone | 1 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | Whorus Heresy | 1 | 0.0023 |
| #4 | Dont Shoot! | 1 | 0.0024 |
| #5 | Mellow | 1 | 0.0047 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nvmi | 95 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #2 | kapk | 78 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #3 | Theeone | 60 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #4 | Swift | 29 | 0.13 | 0 min |
| #5 | //Smurf ζεΎη | 26 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mellow | +3.53 | 69 | 26 |
| #2 | Campoζ©ε¨ | +3.33 | 85 | 59 |
| #3 | kapk | +2.84 | 67 | 44 |
| #4 | Nvmi | +2.25 | 42 | 66 |
| #5 | 3fm | +1.10 | 66 | 72 |





