








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 142 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 149 matches | ||
| Wingman | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




60 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3444 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,038 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3872 | 43% |
| Smokes | 2447 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2345 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 374 | 4% |
Our logs show you have wasted $295,202 of utility $36 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 359 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Unaliven't | 44% | 86 |
| #5 | ジョナス | 44% | 170 |
| #6 | Anakin Rizzwalker | 44% | 64 |
| #7 | dawerdichkire | 32% | 25 |
| #8 | Jist Silver II | 31% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NUMBER TWO MAKOWA FANBOY | +2.58 | 60 | 47 |
| #2 | Jist Silver II | +2.13 | 58 | 38 |
| #3 | Daddy Gaul Soodman OwO | +1.97 | 72 | 46 |
| #4 | Unaliven't | +0.21 | 56 | 53 |
| #5 | ジョナス | -0.06 | 37 | 62 |





