








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 3 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 68 matches | ||
| Wingman | 39 matches | ||
| Premier | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




22 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2179 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,584 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 690 | 12% |
| Smokes | 1582 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1853 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 1459 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $597,992 of utility $137 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LouiVuis | 75% | 16 |
| #2 | freezy | 63% | 41 |
| #3 | Mech | 58% | 12 |
| #4 | D7 | 54% | 13 |
| #5 | Bóbr | 53% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Mech | 58% | 12 |
| #4 | D7 | 54% | 13 |
| #5 | Bóbr | 53% | 15 |
| #6 | F 1 n | 53% | 19 |
| #7 | BigDoggyMomma | 43% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | freezy | 6 | 0.0078 |
| #2 | Bóbr | 4 | 0.0138 |
| #3 | BigDoggyMomma | 3 | 0.0075 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mech | 27 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #2 | freezy | 25 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| #3 | F 1 n | 16 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| #4 | D7 | 13 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| #5 | LouiVuis | 8 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LouiVuis | +4.10 | 93 | 67 |
| #2 | dANNNNi ❟❛❟ | +2.23 | 80 | 47 |
| #3 | D7 | +1.56 | 75 | 37 |
| #4 | freezy | -1.21 | 57 | 36 |
| #5 | Mech | -1.73 | 73 | 56 |





