








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 448 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 210 matches | ||
| Faceit | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 40 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2551 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,139 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2560 | 25% |
| Smokes | 2163 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 2788 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 2628 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $909,336 of utility $152 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 155 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Quacky @ Penicillium roqueforti | 50% | 28 |
| #7 | RØNNY-HS | 50% | 52 |
| #8 | Baowz. . . . | 49% | 37 |
| #9 | Q-('-'Q) Bacon! ☣ | 45% | 38 |
| #10 | PeGz | 43% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CosMO | 4 | 0.0009 |
| #2 | PeGz | 4 | 0.0052 |
| #3 | Q-('-'Q) Bacon! ☣ | 3 | 0.0036 |
| #4 | RØNNY-HS | 2 | 0.0018 |
| #5 | Baowz. . . . | 2 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DennisBotto | +1.24 | 77 | 53 |
| #2 | Lommis | +1.21 | 51 | 71 |
| #3 | Baowz. . . . | +1.07 | 87 | 42 |
| #4 | CosMO | +0.98 | 61 | 75 |
| #5 | Depressed Onion | +0.64 | 46 | 67 |





