








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 348 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 187 matches | ||
| Wingman | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Esplay | 3 matches | 1,395 | |
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 34 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4506 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,904 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2310 | 19% |
| Smokes | 2034 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 4670 | 39% |
| Molotovs | 2890 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,270,921 of utility $209 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 450 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NykΓ€ne | 65% | 37 |
| #2 | Henw | 55% | 161 |
| #3 | D00B3R95 | 54% | 46 |
| #4 | πΌπ-π£β’ | 49% | 240 |
| #5 | Steve | 45% | 213 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Steve | 45% | 213 |
| #6 | flattestpipe | 42% | 60 |
| #7 | finfaitteri | 42% | 96 |
| #8 | Koso | 37% | 65 |
| #9 | koutsi91 | 32% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Steve | 12 | 0.0030 |
| #2 | Henw | 12 | 0.0037 |
| #3 | πΌπ-π£β’ | 10 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | D00B3R95 | 9 | 0.0099 |
| #5 | koutsi91 | 3 | 0.0047 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Henw | 644 | 0.20 | 12 min |
| #2 | Steve | 441 | 0.11 | 11 min |
| #3 | finfaitteri | 336 | 0.17 | 7 min |
| #4 | Koso | 196 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #5 | πΌπ-π£β’ | 183 | 0.04 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NykΓ€ne | +4.96 | 70 | 56 |
| #2 | Henw | +4.58 | 80 | 60 |
| #3 | flattestpipe | +4.25 | 75 | 65 |
| #4 | Steve | +1.04 | 66 | 62 |
| #5 | Koso | +0.05 | 44 | 61 |





