








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 958 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 341 matches | ||
| Premier | 296 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 35 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7901 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 26,651 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10037 | 38% |
| Smokes | 7737 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 3532 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 5345 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,378,258 of utility $151 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 308 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bowler | 56% | 138 |
| #2 | LAMBO | 56% | 45 |
| #3 | Imap298 | 55% | 74 |
| #4 | baniel | 52% | 42 |
| #5 | Balls | 52% | 168 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Imap298 | 55% | 74 |
| #4 | baniel | 52% | 42 |
| #5 | Balls | 52% | 168 |
| #6 | 0% HEADSHOT MACHINE | 51% | 170 |
| #7 | dog 3 | 51% | 133 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Balls | 9 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | 0% HEADSHOT MACHINE | 3 | 0.0008 |
| #3 | bowler | 3 | 0.0010 |
| #4 | dog 3 | 2 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | baniel | 2 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 0% HEADSHOT MACHINE | 1124 | 0.31 | 30 min |
| #2 | Balls | 832 | 0.23 | 19 min |
| #3 | dog 3 | 410 | 0.15 | 9 min |
| #4 | bowler | 389 | 0.13 | 10 min |
| #5 | Imap298 | 204 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Imap298 | +1.84 | 86 | 52 |
| #2 | rangerboyed2 | +1.70 | 83 | 60 |
| #3 | bowler | +0.98 | 75 | 60 |
| #4 | dog 3 | +0.07 | 78 | 50 |
| #5 | Balls | -0.22 | 67 | 58 |





