








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 74 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
362 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 224 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6 | 3% |
| Smokes | 8 | 4% |
| HE Grenades | 154 | 69% |
| Molotovs | 56 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $258,550 of utility $252 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 9 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fizzyturtle | 35% | 26 |
| #2 | oskoskosk | 33% | 27 |
| #3 | Drattus | 29% | 45 |
| #4 | dustysbro | 28% | 47 |
| #5 | brunch bar | 24% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | oskoskosk | 157 | 0.29 | 4 min |
| #2 | dustysbro | 138 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #3 | Fizzyturtle | 89 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #4 | Drattus | 21 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| #5 | brunch bar | 16 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | oskoskosk | +7.95 | 69 | 66 |
| #2 | Fizzyturtle | +3.21 | 69 | 53 |
| #3 | Drattus | -0.58 | 58 | 25 |
| #4 | brunch bar | -0.85 | 44 | 28 |
| #5 | hasan | -1.73 | 29 | 15 |





