








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 25 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 27 matches | ||
| Wingman | 26 matches | ||
| Premier | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
647 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,086 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 492 | 24% |
| Smokes | 472 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 527 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 595 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $102,824 of utility $83 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 11 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DubG | 89% | 9 |
| #2 | 7 inch Plumber | 80% | 5 |
| #3 | polle | 70% | 37 |
| #4 | seBb | 67% | 9 |
| #5 | EDWIN | 67% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | polle | 1 | 0.0015 |
| #2 | kevinu | 1 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kevinu | 116 | 0.33 | 3 min |
| #2 | polle | 98 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #3 | EDWIN | 87 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| #4 | DubG | 81 | 0.38 | 2 min |
| #5 | seBb | 40 | 0.21 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Morvii | +3.45 | 85 | 68 |
| #2 | rajden | +3.13 | 74 | 56 |
| #3 | DubG | +1.60 | 67 | 67 |
| #4 | kevinu | +1.58 | 76 | 76 |
| #5 | polle | +0.98 | 89 | 65 |





