










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 325 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 102 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 37 matches | ||
| Premier | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




125 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2845 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,131 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2457 | 34% |
| Smokes | 1926 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1733 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1015 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,314,918 of utility $178 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1360 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | otamot | 66 | 0.0121 |
| #2 | lemonballs | 62 | 0.0183 |
| #3 | sniper monkey | 26 | 0.0144 |
| #4 | promiscuous | 21 | 0.0087 |
| #5 | Potato Head.tractor | 11 | 0.0206 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | otamot | 667 | 0.12 | 16 min |
| #2 | sniper monkey | 338 | 0.19 | 7 min |
| #3 | lemonballs | 239 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #4 | floor | 231 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| #5 | promiscuous | 170 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | otamot | +3.71 | 71 | 55 |
| #2 | floor | +2.37 | 86 | 47 |
| #3 | sniper monkey | +1.40 | 75 | 46 |
| #4 | lemonballs | -0.05 | 47 | 32 |
| #5 | promiscuous | -1.50 | 46 | 51 |





