








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 361 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Faceit | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1868 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,757 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 746 | 20% |
| Smokes | 734 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 1639 | 44% |
| Molotovs | 638 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $602,532 of utility $183 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 109 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | ♛AdicakSK ♛ | 48% | 110 |
| #10 | StealBack | 45% | 11 |
| #11 | WOD | 45% | 38 |
| #12 | Jozefko | 41% | 64 |
| #13 | SALI | 28% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Stanislaw | 11 | 0.0034 |
| #2 | ✪ Pixel | 5 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | ♛AdicakSK ♛ | 3 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | WOD | 2 | 0.0024 |
| #5 | Jozefko | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Stanislaw | 471 | 0.14 | 11 min |
| #2 | ♛AdicakSK ♛ | 248 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #3 | WOD | 85 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #4 | Jozefko | 80 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #5 | ✪ Pixel | 59 | 0.03 | 2 min |





