








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 162 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 80 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1494 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,747 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 426 | 16% |
| Smokes | 645 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 797 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 879 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $956,545 of utility $155 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 37 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Team? SANS | 75% | 20 |
| #2 | L0b0r0n | 63% | 16 |
| #3 | 1 euro kebab | 62% | 37 |
| #4 | JorgeBarbichuelo | 58% | 24 |
| #5 | GonxoBiceps | 56% | 177 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GonxoBiceps | 29 | 0.0083 |
| #2 | ARCHI | 11 | 0.0047 |
| #3 | JorgeBarbichuelo | 5 | 0.0102 |
| #4 | Bl4ckWolf | 4 | 0.0018 |
| #5 | w_Jan | 4 | 0.0055 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GonxoBiceps | 565 | 0.16 | 17 min |
| #2 | Bl4ckWolf | 365 | 0.17 | 8 min |
| #3 | ARCHI | 150 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #4 | w_Jan | 123 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #5 | Blue Freakhound | 76 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GonxoBiceps | +7.68 | 77 | 76 |
| #2 | Team? SANS | +7.11 | 83 | 71 |
| #3 | Bl4ckWolf | +4.84 | 69 | 66 |
| #4 | 1 euro kebab | +1.49 | 57 | 39 |
| #5 | Blue Freakhound | +1.06 | 72 | 55 |





