








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 492 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 180 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 156 matches | ||
| Faceit | 114 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




69 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6057 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,261 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5028 | 31% |
| Smokes | 4246 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 3400 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 3587 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,243,993 of utility $110 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 205 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ezelpigu | 90% | 30 |
| #2 | ✪灵活小胖子 | 76% | 33 |
| #3 | Gentle Wife Beater | 75% | 28 |
| #4 | P0iS0N0uS | 71% | 48 |
| #5 | Fish | 70% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fish | +4.85 | 77 | 58 |
| #2 | sKjr | +3.88 | 87 | 56 |
| #3 | ✪灵活小胖子 | +3.12 | 83 | 60 |
| #4 | P0iS0N0uS | +1.62 | 90 | 51 |
| #5 | zed si onliner | +1.57 | 77 | 59 |





