








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 3 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
155 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 383 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 85 | 22% |
| Smokes | 156 | 41% |
| HE Grenades | 69 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 73 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $93,753 of utility $255 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 46 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wretch | 100% | 2 |
| #2 | DocBrodo | 100% | 2 |
| #3 | Jammidodger | 100% | 2 |
| #4 | Fistful of Shit | 100% | 2 |
| #5 | StaityJnr | 75% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Peter | 2 | 0.0109 |
| #2 | Serjino | 1 | 0.0056 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DocBrodo | +6.89 | 72 | 36 |
| #2 | Fistful of Shit | +3.04 | 77 | 61 |
| #3 | daki | +2.51 | 84 | 71 |
| #4 | StaityJnr | +2.50 | 64 | 25 |
| #5 | Serjino | +0.98 | 88 | 65 |





