








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 11 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 56 matches | ||
| Premier | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1405 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,135 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 721 | 23% |
| Smokes | 839 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 942 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 633 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $746,390 of utility $237 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 77 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 🧛🏿 | 77% | 30 |
| #2 | shouta | 69% | 67 |
| #3 | Kuarterz | 67% | 9 |
| #4 | Namárië | 63% | 90 |
| #5 | Silty | 63% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Silty | 63% | 19 |
| #6 | Running | 61% | 97 |
| #7 | MrBeeF | 60% | 104 |
| #8 | Status | 46% | 13 |
| #9 | MyHomieMorgis | 45% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MrBeeF | 7 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | Running | 4 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | Namárië | 3 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | shouta | 2 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | Status | 1 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Running | 292 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| #2 | MrBeeF | 230 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #3 | shouta | 189 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #4 | Namárië | 170 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #5 | MyHomieMorgis | 80 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kuarterz | +3.07 | 73 | 67 |
| #2 | MrBeeF | +2.98 | 84 | 61 |
| #3 | 🧛🏿 | +2.00 | 85 | 48 |
| #4 | Namárië | +1.69 | 77 | 63 |
| #5 | ✪Riverdead_Rize.tv | +0.89 | 73 | 52 |





