








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 7 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 20 matches | ||
| Premier | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




32 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1344 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,021 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1129 | 22% |
| Smokes | 1517 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1048 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1327 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $189,364 of utility $65 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 6 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Max Cooper | 55% | 103 |
| #2 | 傑 | 51% | 63 |
| #3 | scene .x. -tKfoW- | 51% | 77 |
| #4 | Gilgameth, Dweller of the Night | 42% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Max Cooper | 55% | 103 |
| #2 | 傑 | 51% | 63 |
| #3 | scene .x. -tKfoW- | 51% | 77 |
| #4 | Gilgameth, Dweller of the Night | 42% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gilgameth, Dweller of the Night | 16 | 0.0243 |
| #2 | 傑 | 14 | 0.0107 |
| #3 | scene .x. -tKfoW- | 11 | 0.0065 |
| #4 | Max Cooper | 10 | 0.0048 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Max Cooper | 370 | 0.18 | 6 min |
| #2 | scene .x. -tKfoW- | 327 | 0.19 | 6 min |
| #3 | 傑 | 89 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #4 | Gilgameth, Dweller of the Night | 47 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | scene .x. -tKfoW- | +3.00 | 67 | 59 |
| #2 | 傑 | +2.07 | 52 | 28 |
| #3 | Richard | +0.64 | 70 | 57 |
| #4 | Max Cooper | -1.02 | 67 | 49 |
| #5 | Gilgameth, Dweller of the Night | -1.22 | 52 | 34 |





