








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 40 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 336 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3354 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,575 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 309 | 7% |
| Smokes | 1053 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1807 | 39% |
| Molotovs | 1406 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,034,202 of utility $105 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 239 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bacxn | 66% | 35 |
| #2 | AHHHHHHHHHH | 61% | 46 |
| #3 | xxx | 52% | 85 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bacxn | 66% | 35 |
| #2 | AHHHHHHHHHH | 61% | 46 |
| #3 | xxx | 52% | 85 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xxx | 8 | 0.0045 |
| #2 | AHHHHHHHHHH | 2 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xxx | 246 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #2 | AHHHHHHHHHH | 65 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #3 | bacxn | 34 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AHHHHHHHHHH | +3.22 | 66 | 71 |
| #2 | bacxn | +2.66 | 72 | 70 |
| #3 | xxx | +0.64 | 59 | 56 |
| #4 | Gemu | +0.38 | 56 | 27 |





