










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1239 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 38 matches | ||
| Premier | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 243 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




30 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3327 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,334 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1263 | 15% |
| Smokes | 2233 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2631 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 2207 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,030,914 of utility $170 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 608 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BOB HELLFIRE | 67% | 15 |
| #2 | 『Pørcupine』 | 64% | 22 |
| #3 | coolyer | 58% | 180 |
| #4 | blond1e | 57% | 168 |
| #5 | PH1LP0TT | 56% | 205 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PH1LP0TT | 346 | 0.08 | 8 min |
| #2 | coolyer | 263 | 0.07 | 7 min |
| #3 | blond1e | 67 | 0.02 | 2 min |
| #4 | 『Pørcupine』 | 34 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #5 | B0NELE$$ | 26 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pitdog | +4.84 | 92 | 54 |
| #2 | BOB HELLFIRE | +2.47 | 82 | 52 |
| #3 | PH1LP0TT | +1.65 | 79 | 65 |
| #4 | coolyer | +0.96 | 78 | 55 |
| #5 | 『Pørcupine』 | -0.75 | 84 | 39 |





