








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 205 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 322 matches | ||
| Premier | 75 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4339 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,950 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1338 | 17% |
| Smokes | 1558 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 4115 | 52% |
| Molotovs | 939 | 12% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,462,448 of utility $151 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 243 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SK | 57% | 138 |
| #2 | Pimpuś | 56% | 123 |
| #3 | MiniCocksick | 53% | 227 |
| #4 | Fanforek | 53% | 290 |
| #5 | 0vs3ジ | 53% | 177 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fanforek | 12 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | MiniCocksick | 12 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | spermstein | 11 | 0.0034 |
| #4 | Pimpuś | 11 | 0.0043 |
| #5 | 0vs3ジ | 3 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MiniCocksick | 663 | 0.14 | 16 min |
| #2 | Fanforek | 606 | 0.10 | 17 min |
| #3 | Golem JD | 534 | 0.16 | 15 min |
| #4 | SK | 519 | 0.17 | 14 min |
| #5 | spermstein | 415 | 0.13 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fanforek | +3.67 | 86 | 65 |
| #2 | Raphinha SKINS | +3.26 | 81 | 53 |
| #3 | Pimpuś | +2.46 | 84 | 69 |
| #4 | SK | +0.44 | 71 | 70 |
| #5 | toxic yaśó | +0.38 | 65 | 46 |





