








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 964 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 433 matches | ||
| Faceit | 85 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 68 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




109 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8711 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,446 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5944 | 29% |
| Smokes | 5495 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 3884 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 5123 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,686,035 of utility $159 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 268 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | maqueenya♛ | 50% | 157 |
| #9 | Wuchtiges Waffeleisen | 43% | 53 |
| #10 | itzPepe | 43% | 119 |
| #11 | ✞ 1Anja | 41% | 144 |
| #12 | 🌀JohnJayJackson🌀 | 40% | 123 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ecki | 32 | 0.0060 |
| #2 | ✞ 1Anja | 19 | 0.0063 |
| #3 | 🌀JohnJayJackson🌀 | 18 | 0.0070 |
| #4 | itzPepe | 10 | 0.0040 |
| #5 | .Rim3Xx°° | 10 | 0.0103 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ecki | 668 | 0.13 | 11 min |
| #2 | itzPepe | 444 | 0.18 | 12 min |
| #3 | ✞ 1Anja | 413 | 0.14 | 12 min |
| #4 | 🌀JohnJayJackson🌀 | 354 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #5 | ribertobi | 192 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wuestenschlange | +3.20 | 85 | 57 |
| #2 | ☆Major☆Executie☆ | +1.95 | 82 | 28 |
| #3 | Wuchtiges Waffeleisen | +1.93 | 88 | 58 |
| #4 | ribertobi | +1.70 | 68 | 74 |
| #5 | Chloe ☁ | +1.07 | 88 | 72 |





