








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1062 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 83 matches | ||
| Faceit | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 19 matches | ||
| Wingman | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 70 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4009 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,425 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3201 | 26% |
| Smokes | 4044 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 2140 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 3040 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,383,241 of utility $168 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 815 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Xefolin™ | 56% | 93 |
| #10 | VeNeN0♰ | 55% | 62 |
| #11 | Th€ GuArDiAn ツ | 54% | 56 |
| #12 | Y4zur1 | 53% | 68 |
| #13 | Mimbre | 48% | 66 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | garciç | 16 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | Legendario | 14 | 0.0049 |
| #3 | Vort-x | 8 | 0.0086 |
| #4 | Xefolin™ | 7 | 0.0037 |
| #5 | Mamá? | 5 | 0.0045 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | garciç | 879 | 0.17 | 22 min |
| #2 | Legendario | 340 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #3 | Vort-x | 227 | 0.25 | 6 min |
| #4 | Th€ GuArDiAn ツ | 208 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #5 | Y4zur1 | 188 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ojoloco886 | +3.67 | 75 | 68 |
| #2 | Th€ GuArDiAn ツ | +3.33 | 87 | 62 |
| #3 | PacoPantanos | +2.35 | 81 | 71 |
| #4 | Vort-x | +1.85 | 74 | 65 |
| #5 | 0ni_**** | +1.05 | 71 | 56 |





