








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 293 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 260 matches | ||
| Faceit | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3372 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,381 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 904 | 21% |
| Smokes | 1306 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1509 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 662 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,053,465 of utility $287 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 65 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bysted \\ | 64% | 53 |
| #2 | vilderen^ | 62% | 21 |
| #3 | Nicki_G | 61% | 36 |
| #4 | Kaws | 58% | 62 |
| #5 | save | 55% | 66 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wild-Jam | 5 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | PEST | 5 | 0.0036 |
| #3 | BC | 4 | 0.0027 |
| #4 | Xplized | 4 | 0.0033 |
| #5 | Kaws | 3 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wild-Jam | 533 | 0.23 | 16 min |
| #2 | save | 302 | 0.21 | 8 min |
| #3 | BC | 261 | 0.18 | 8 min |
| #4 | Bysted \\ | 121 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #5 | PEST | 114 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kaws | +2.45 | 82 | 63 |
| #2 | vilderen^ | +2.30 | 77 | 55 |
| #3 | Suk Mike Hok | +1.59 | 74 | 44 |
| #4 | Mic | +0.26 | 69 | 58 |
| #5 | PEST | +0.13 | 73 | 67 |





