








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 5 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 26 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
407 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 805 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 241 | 30% |
| Smokes | 174 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 336 | 42% |
| Molotovs | 54 | 7% |
Our logs show you have wasted $137,492 of utility $132 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr`Beav | 40% | 35 |
| #2 | USB FLUTSH | 33% | 9 |
| #3 | sv_cheats 1 | 25% | 4 |
| #4 | R.A.T.S.S.Mr`Fluff | 15% | 13 |
| #5 | Pudding | 14% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr`Beav | 40% | 35 |
| #2 | USB FLUTSH | 33% | 9 |
| #3 | sv_cheats 1 | 25% | 4 |
| #4 | R.A.T.S.S.Mr`Fluff | 15% | 13 |
| #5 | Pudding | 14% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | USB FLUTSH | 4 | 0.0190 |
| #2 | Mr`Beav | 3 | 0.0039 |
| #3 | R.A.T.S.S.Mr`Fluff | 2 | 0.0069 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr`Beav | 78 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #2 | USB FLUTSH | 16 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| #3 | R.A.T.S.S.Mr`Fluff | 12 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| #4 | Pudding | 9 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | USB FLUTSH | +1.00 | 52 | 67 |
| #2 | R.A.T.S.S.Mr`Fluff | +0.76 | 65 | 58 |
| #3 | Mr`Beav | -0.89 | 55 | 62 |
| #4 | Tiffany Twisted | -1.83 | 58 | 41 |
| #5 | Pudding | -3.13 | 25 | 37 |





