








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 754 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 663 matches | ||
| Premier | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 46 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7399 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 37,602 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 12589 | 33% |
| Smokes | 10541 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 7156 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 7316 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,556,068 of utility $95 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 97 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vaiski | 61% | 135 |
| #2 | nanu | 55% | 273 |
| #3 | mGiTsi | 55% | 77 |
| #4 | tcola | 52% | 60 |
| #5 | subutex willer | 50% | 567 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | KaaQ | 50% | 422 |
| #8 | Sandaalitanssi | 49% | 47 |
| #9 | naB | 49% | 335 |
| #10 | Cyanide | 47% | 47 |
| #11 | viseN | 45% | 170 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | subutex willer | 5 | 0.0004 |
| #2 | teppo223 | 4 | 0.0004 |
| #3 | nanu | 4 | 0.0007 |
| #4 | Sandaalitanssi | 4 | 0.0037 |
| #5 | naB | 3 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | subutex willer | 2553 | 0.21 | 85 min |
| #2 | teppo223 | 1860 | 0.18 | 50 min |
| #3 | nanu | 1237 | 0.21 | 35 min |
| #4 | KaaQ | 1050 | 0.11 | 33 min |
| #5 | viseN | 849 | 0.22 | 27 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vaiski | +1.71 | 84 | 63 |
| #2 | nanu | +1.51 | 80 | 67 |
| #3 | teppo223 | +1.49 | 77 | 78 |
| #4 | Hagrid | +1.04 | 79 | 80 |
| #5 | viseN | +0.65 | 61 | 79 |





