








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 137 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 66 matches | ||
| Faceit | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2871 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,217 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1626 | 31% |
| Smokes | 1023 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 1244 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1324 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $269,554 of utility $64 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 172 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Despair | 71% | 14 |
| #2 | Aspxct_Games | 69% | 16 |
| #3 | hyza LEONHART | 59% | 32 |
| #4 | Myth | 57% | 106 |
| #5 | ilickmypetrock | 55% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Myth | 57% | 106 |
| #5 | ilickmypetrock | 55% | 29 |
| #6 | hockeynoodles | 51% | 41 |
| #7 | MVP Mailman | 48% | 25 |
| #8 | CentralSouthOfficeParkManager | 45% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hockeynoodles | 10 | 0.0119 |
| #2 | Myth | 6 | 0.0029 |
| #3 | MVP Mailman | 2 | 0.0039 |
| #4 | hyza LEONHART | 1 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | Despair | 1 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Myth | 248 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #2 | hockeynoodles | 155 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #3 | MVP Mailman | 106 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| #4 | hyza LEONHART | 81 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #5 | ilickmypetrock | 56 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hyza LEONHART | +3.76 | 88 | 68 |
| #2 | ChrisChin | +2.71 | 95 | 61 |
| #3 | MVP Mailman | +1.99 | 79 | 50 |
| #4 | CentralSouthOfficeParkManager | +1.09 | 93 | 21 |
| #5 | ilickmypetrock | -0.07 | 88 | 59 |





