








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 419 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 347 matches | ||
| Faceit | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




53 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4954 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,112 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3034 | 37% |
| Smokes | 1768 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 1939 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1371 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,308,119 of utility $144 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 374 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | !Milete ⇄ Trading | 63% | 24 |
| #2 | 4llwaysBad | 59% | 27 |
| #3 | noaim | 56% | 32 |
| #4 | Pixelrat | 52% | 25 |
| #5 | RUMPPO | 52% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Henkisesti silver | 46% | 61 |
| #8 | Zsumppi | 42% | 26 |
| #9 | mainmap kouvola | 41% | 27 |
| #10 | ♿Tsekkipiiska♿ | 41% | 37 |
| #11 | hindu | 35% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mainmap kouvola | 4 | 0.0068 |
| #2 | 4llwaysBad | 3 | 0.0054 |
| #3 | Pixelrat | 3 | 0.0055 |
| #4 | RUMPPO | 2 | 0.0029 |
| #5 | noaim | 2 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Henkisesti silver | 139 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #2 | Pixelrat | 129 | 0.24 | 4 min |
| #3 | 4llwaysBad | 127 | 0.23 | 3 min |
| #4 | noaim | 121 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #5 | mainmap kouvola | 118 | 0.20 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pixelrat | +3.28 | 77 | 78 |
| #2 | !Milete ⇄ Trading | +2.21 | 67 | 38 |
| #3 | Vitamiini | +1.41 | 76 | 37 |
| #4 | Vauvanorsu | +1.08 | 69 | 50 |
| #5 | 4llwaysBad | +0.97 | 45 | 59 |





