








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 270 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 266 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 30 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2418 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,186 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1791 | 18% |
| Smokes | 3197 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 2853 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 2345 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,005,445 of utility $165 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 106 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | YUNG NOOB 1337 | 66% | 59 |
| #2 | hur | 63% | 27 |
| #3 | MRruthlesss | 56% | 18 |
| #4 | CHICKEN ☣ | 54% | 101 |
| #5 | Vammze | 53% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Batman | 353 | 0.11 | 11 min |
| #2 | Mifu | 221 | 0.15 | 8 min |
| #3 | CHICKEN ☣ | 162 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #4 | YUNG NOOB 1337 | 119 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #5 | hur | 74 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | YUNG NOOB 1337 | +2.82 | 84 | 53 |
| #2 | MRruthlesss | +2.48 | 70 | 53 |
| #3 | Vammze | +1.59 | 75 | 62 |
| #4 | hur | +1.38 | 67 | 67 |
| #5 | D3nM4rk | +0.94 | 78 | 57 |





