










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 408 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 401 matches | ||
| Esplay | 13 matches | 2,186 | |
| Faceit | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5867 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,976 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4631 | 42% |
| Smokes | 2740 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 3138 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 467 | 4% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,205,970 of utility $127 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 849 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ToWzErA | 8 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | ✪ exib0 | 7 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | egem | 4 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | -nahoj | 3 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | WhondFreak | 2 | 0.0024 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | egem | 423 | 0.23 | 11 min |
| #2 | ✪ exib0 | 410 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| #3 | ToWzErA | 358 | 0.11 | 9 min |
| #4 | -nahoj | 175 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #5 | kanzel | 91 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | -nahoj | +3.08 | 93 | 56 |
| #2 | cj | +2.51 | 85 | 56 |
| #3 | MrPepper | +2.32 | 98 | 55 |
| #4 | spezle | +1.05 | 85 | 48 |
| #5 | egem | -0.02 | 56 | 69 |





