








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1295 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 551 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 117 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5436 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 26,605 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8946 | 34% |
| Smokes | 6400 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 7139 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 4120 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,752,243 of utility $140 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | w00lly | 52% | 466 |
| #2 | unrthodoxx | 52% | 309 |
| #3 | Yai | 51% | 95 |
| #4 | giddyS | 50% | 114 |
| #5 | _WhiteFire_ | 48% | 99 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | unrthodoxx | 52% | 309 |
| #3 | Yai | 51% | 95 |
| #4 | giddyS | 50% | 114 |
| #5 | _WhiteFire_ | 48% | 99 |
| #6 | Lugi | 48% | 56 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | w00lly | 16 | 0.0016 |
| #2 | unrthodoxx | 12 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | _WhiteFire_ | 7 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | Yai | 6 | 0.0030 |
| #5 | giddyS | 1 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | w00lly | 718 | 0.07 | 19 min |
| #2 | giddyS | 366 | 0.15 | 8 min |
| #3 | Yai | 282 | 0.14 | 9 min |
| #4 | unrthodoxx | 212 | 0.03 | 6 min |
| #5 | _WhiteFire_ | 149 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yai | +1.69 | 76 | 60 |
| #2 | Pr0lex | +1.48 | 71 | 72 |
| #3 | _WhiteFire_ | +0.88 | 70 | 72 |
| #4 | w00lly | -1.23 | 38 | 67 |
| #5 | unrthodoxx | -1.56 | 50 | 55 |





