










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 111 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
604 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,176 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 712 | 33% |
| Smokes | 538 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 361 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 565 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $246,878 of utility $144 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 117 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | shrimpfan63504 | 83% | 6 |
| #2 | C0D3M4N | 63% | 24 |
| #3 | shrimpfan63501 | 62% | 21 |
| #4 | crablicker58 | 61% | 59 |
| #5 | stiLLmatic | 59% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | shrimpfan63504 | 83% | 6 |
| #2 | C0D3M4N | 63% | 24 |
| #3 | shrimpfan63501 | 62% | 21 |
| #4 | crablicker58 | 61% | 59 |
| #5 | stiLLmatic | 59% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | crablicker58 | 6 | 0.0051 |
| #2 | C0D3M4N | 1 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | shrimpfan63501 | 1 | 0.0023 |
| #4 | shrimpfan63504 | 1 | 0.0093 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | crablicker58 | 103 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #2 | shrimpfan63501 | 54 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #3 | C0D3M4N | 51 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #4 | stiLLmatic | 47 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #5 | shrimpfan63504 | 22 | 0.20 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | C0D3M4N | +5.62 | 78 | 62 |
| #2 | shrimpfan63504 | +3.41 | 86 | 69 |
| #3 | crablicker58 | +2.54 | 88 | 67 |
| #4 | shrimpfan63501 | +1.75 | 70 | 71 |
| #5 | stiLLmatic | -1.59 | 58 | 68 |





