








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 943 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Inferno | 306 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 271 matches | ||
| Premier | 257 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 122 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 120 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 95 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 85 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 40 matches | ||
| Faceit | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 148 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




138 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
11859 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 74,638 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 23157 | 31% |
| Smokes | 20322 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 15242 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 15917 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,467,776 of utility $53 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3220 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | John Deep | 63% | 136 |
| #2 | darkrider | 61% | 427 |
| #3 | Flo | 59% | 76 |
| #4 | cete | 58% | 302 |
| #5 | Phenomenon.™ | 57% | 153 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nils | 60 | 0.0097 |
| #2 | Flarax | 52 | 0.0093 |
| #3 | cete | 15 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | darkrider | 14 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | John Deep | 9 | 0.0034 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | darkrider | 1085 | 0.13 | 29 min |
| #2 | Nils | 799 | 0.13 | 20 min |
| #3 | cete | 496 | 0.08 | 14 min |
| #4 | Flarax | 459 | 0.08 | 14 min |
| #5 | John Deep | 449 | 0.17 | 11 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cete | +2.61 | 78 | 66 |
| #2 | darkrider | +2.44 | 81 | 56 |
| #3 | Nils | +1.50 | 84 | 65 |
| #4 | Flarax | +0.94 | 81 | 57 |
| #5 | Hakan | +0.50 | 73 | 78 |





