








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 13 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 395 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 26 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3155 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,043 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2698 | 21% |
| Smokes | 3319 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 3846 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 3180 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,108,959 of utility $111 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 80 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vette | 71% | 24 |
| #2 | No | 54% | 228 |
| #3 | Cwood | 54% | 216 |
| #4 | ROOK | 53% | 290 |
| #5 | TheDyl | 52% | 246 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | No | 54% | 228 |
| #3 | Cwood | 54% | 216 |
| #4 | ROOK | 53% | 290 |
| #5 | TheDyl | 52% | 246 |
| #6 | JC SWAGGER | 40% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ROOK | 15 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | TheDyl | 9 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | Cwood | 7 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | No | 6 | 0.0012 |
| #5 | JC SWAGGER | 1 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ROOK | 2013 | 0.33 | 51 min |
| #2 | TheDyl | 731 | 0.14 | 19 min |
| #3 | Cwood | 565 | 0.12 | 10 min |
| #4 | No | 301 | 0.06 | 7 min |
| #5 | Vette | 97 | 0.21 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vette | +2.69 | 81 | 67 |
| #2 | JC SWAGGER | +1.40 | 58 | 52 |
| #3 | No | +1.22 | 49 | 53 |
| #4 | ROOK | +1.04 | 71 | 73 |
| #5 | TheDyl | +0.65 | 73 | 64 |





