








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 17 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 125 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1660 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,793 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1094 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1699 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 859 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 1141 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $324,846 of utility $109 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nadinaRoy | 86% | 7 |
| #2 | y4nnisss | 75% | 8 |
| #3 | vincinho | 74% | 68 |
| #4 | flex | 69% | 13 |
| #5 | TEKO | 68% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | fRancisco | 65% | 49 |
| #10 | mat^xDxD9_9 | 63% | 8 |
| #11 | latessmax | 62% | 26 |
| #12 | LOLOOOOOOOOO | 50% | 22 |
| #13 | Styff | 43% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hqx_x | 2 | 0.0009 |
| #2 | y4nnisss | 2 | 0.0132 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hqx_x | 422 | 0.18 | 10 min |
| #2 | Dawny (ง’̀-‘́)ง | 252 | 0.20 | 8 min |
| #3 | smooth_criminal ⚡ | 178 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #4 | vincinho | 128 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #5 | fRancisco | 123 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | h3xtechh_hh | +2.70 | 83 | 62 |
| #2 | Dawny (ง’̀-‘́)ง | +2.33 | 91 | 75 |
| #3 | hqx_x | +2.16 | 96 | 58 |
| #4 | Styff | +0.64 | 78 | 62 |
| #5 | fRancisco | +0.56 | 82 | 64 |





