








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 918 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 419 matches | ||
| Faceit | 22 matches | ||
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 133 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




64 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5238 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,968 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4499 | 28% |
| Smokes | 3849 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 3555 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 4065 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,231,962 of utility $197 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 467 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Feet Muncher | 52% | 60 |
| #2 | Baba Yetu | 49% | 47 |
| #3 | swag | 48% | 60 |
| #4 | evdi | 47% | 221 |
| #5 | Maple | 46% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | Diddern | 44% | 34 |
| #11 | 4strand | 43% | 86 |
| #12 | BLACKMAN | 43% | 54 |
| #13 | Seung-Hui Cho | 42% | 31 |
| #14 | HILTI TE-7 | 33% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | evdi | 23 | 0.0049 |
| #2 | swag | 10 | 0.0079 |
| #3 | ✪ Feet Muncher | 8 | 0.0065 |
| #4 | 4strand | 7 | 0.0038 |
| #5 | chillaG😵💫 | 7 | 0.0068 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | chillaG😵💫 | +4.05 | 88 | 73 |
| #2 | evdi | +1.87 | 84 | 64 |
| #3 | Baba Yetu | +1.15 | 64 | 70 |
| #4 | ✪ Feet Muncher | +1.04 | 83 | 57 |
| #5 | gravel eater | +0.97 | 58 | 59 |





