








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 217 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 146 matches | ||
| Premier | 23 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2344 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,951 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1920 | 28% |
| Smokes | 2047 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1317 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 1667 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $522,465 of utility $116 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 272 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | ChriS' | 50% | 12 |
| #10 | Lacinth | 50% | 24 |
| #11 | ✪ Frozen® | 50% | 54 |
| #12 | Alec | 47% | 49 |
| #13 | NiVB3X | 42% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cl0utz-1337- | 4 | 0.0064 |
| #2 | pr1me | 3 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | FlaX0 | 3 | 0.0041 |
| #4 | Alec | 2 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | KRM | 1 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Frozen® | 238 | 0.21 | 6 min |
| #2 | pr1me | 226 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #3 | KRM | 183 | 0.23 | 4 min |
| #4 | Alec | 120 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #5 | Knigge | 87 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cl0utz-1337- | +4.02 | 95 | 49 |
| #2 | shiine | +2.03 | 84 | 70 |
| #3 | NiVB3X | +1.65 | 97 | 47 |
| #4 | Hulk998 | +1.62 | 65 | 65 |
| #5 | h0w to b00m $kywars^ | +0.79 | 92 | 63 |





