








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1440 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 132 matches | ||
| Premier | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 42 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3525 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,544 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2418 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1899 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 2543 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 2684 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $749,915 of utility $151 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 388 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kokke | 88% | 16 |
| #2 | Headshot Machine | 74% | 19 |
| #3 | vhd- | 64% | 14 |
| #4 | Joelo | 63% | 97 |
| #5 | jääse | 63% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | simo | 58% | 31 |
| #9 | Pulius | 58% | 33 |
| #10 | Stepsister (hot) | 57% | 14 |
| #11 | Peeta | 53% | 15 |
| #12 | Wilkerr | 43% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | juhitsu | 3 | 0.0036 |
| #2 | vhd- | 2 | 0.0163 |
| #3 | Joelo | 1 | 0.0005 |
| #4 | Stepsister (hot) | 1 | 0.0033 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Joelo | 683 | 0.32 | 18 min |
| #2 | DnZ | 410 | 0.17 | 10 min |
| #3 | Wilkerr | 61 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #4 | Kokke | 61 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #5 | juhitsu | 44 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | koige | +4.76 | 88 | 70 |
| #2 | Peeta | +3.59 | 83 | 62 |
| #3 | DnZ | +1.01 | 71 | 66 |
| #4 | Kokke | +0.33 | 54 | 74 |
| #5 | vhd- | -0.01 | 69 | 34 |





