








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 305 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 366 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2897 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,952 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4626 | 26% |
| Smokes | 3847 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 5332 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 4147 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $772,111 of utility $82 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 709 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rufus | 58% | 26 |
| #2 | MoonDeity | 57% | 95 |
| #3 | ✘AZelbmerT✘ | 55% | 44 |
| #4 | benji | 54% | 248 |
| #5 | Excessive | 52% | 251 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✘Bullock✘ | 22 | 0.0042 |
| #2 | benji | 10 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | ✘Dash Granny✘ | 6 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | Excessive | 4 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | MoonDeity | 3 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✘Bullock✘ | 1342 | 0.26 | 31 min |
| #2 | benji | 950 | 0.18 | 29 min |
| #3 | Excessive | 714 | 0.13 | 19 min |
| #4 | ✘Dash Granny✘ | 511 | 0.11 | 12 min |
| #5 | MoonDeity | 324 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Excessive | +4.66 | 86 | 69 |
| #2 | Rufus | +3.94 | 68 | 72 |
| #3 | ✘Bullock✘ | +2.53 | 60 | 56 |
| #4 | MoonDeity | +2.53 | 76 | 54 |
| #5 | benji | +1.78 | 76 | 74 |





