








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 619 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 387 matches | ||
| Faceit | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6243 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,593 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5306 | 29% |
| Smokes | 4555 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 4246 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 4486 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,096,306 of utility $109 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 665 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MoonDeity | 59% | 122 |
| #2 | benji | 55% | 353 |
| #3 | LOLYOU | 54% | 317 |
| #4 | ✘Dash Granny✘ | 54% | 315 |
| #5 | ✘Bullock✘ | 53% | 269 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✘Bullock✘ | 21 | 0.0037 |
| #2 | benji | 16 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | mediocrates | 6 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | ✘Dash Granny✘ | 5 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | MoonDeity | 4 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✘Bullock✘ | 1497 | 0.27 | 34 min |
| #2 | benji | 1328 | 0.18 | 40 min |
| #3 | mediocrates | 690 | 0.13 | 15 min |
| #4 | ✘Dash Granny✘ | 641 | 0.10 | 15 min |
| #5 | LOLYOU | 446 | 0.07 | 11 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Excessive | +4.55 | 87 | 69 |
| #2 | MoonDeity | +2.14 | 76 | 56 |
| #3 | Creative | +2.08 | 82 | 69 |
| #4 | benji | +1.61 | 76 | 73 |
| #5 | ✘Bullock✘ | +1.51 | 58 | 58 |





