








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 380 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 158 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1397 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,986 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1271 | 32% |
| Smokes | 793 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 1144 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 778 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $749,873 of utility $182 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 271 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ALDo | 49% | 103 |
| #2 | Ssamch | 47% | 171 |
| #3 | Luwyl Chu | 45% | 120 |
| #4 | Stone | 44% | 132 |
| #5 | hero | 40% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ALDo | 49% | 103 |
| #2 | Ssamch | 47% | 171 |
| #3 | Luwyl Chu | 45% | 120 |
| #4 | Stone | 44% | 132 |
| #5 | hero | 40% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Luwyl Chu | 7 | 0.0027 |
| #2 | Stone | 4 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | Ssamch | 2 | 0.0006 |
| #4 | ALDo | 1 | 0.0005 |
| #5 | hero | 1 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ssamch | 819 | 0.23 | 20 min |
| #2 | Luwyl Chu | 306 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #3 | Stone | 290 | 0.10 | 10 min |
| #4 | ALDo | 167 | 0.08 | 6 min |
| #5 | hero | 76 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Luwyl Chu | +2.83 | 79 | 59 |
| #2 | ALDo | +0.72 | 82 | 45 |
| #3 | Ssamch | -0.19 | 59 | 54 |
| #4 | hero | -0.48 | 56 | 55 |
| #5 | Stone | -1.13 | 36 | 69 |





