










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 119 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 151 matches | ||
| Wingman | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 8 matches | ||
| Faceit | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 27 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2393 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,316 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 393 | 5% |
| Smokes | 1903 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 3216 | 39% |
| Molotovs | 2804 | 34% |
Our logs show you have wasted $559,273 of utility $72 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 82 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pizoler | 49% | 100 |
| #2 | FallenGod | 45% | 74 |
| #3 | Greenzombie | 45% | 184 |
| #4 | Samu | 41% | 201 |
| #5 | Sgt. Relice | 39% | 41 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Greenzombie | 45% | 184 |
| #4 | Samu | 41% | 201 |
| #5 | Sgt. Relice | 39% | 41 |
| #6 | UME Nero⛟ | 38% | 149 |
| #7 | o0Sasaki0o | 32% | 71 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Greenzombie | 40 | 0.0106 |
| #2 | Samu | 30 | 0.0074 |
| #3 | UME Nero⛟ | 10 | 0.0033 |
| #4 | Pizoler | 8 | 0.0038 |
| #5 | Sgt. Relice | 8 | 0.0093 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Samu | 794 | 0.20 | 15 min |
| #2 | Greenzombie | 561 | 0.15 | 12 min |
| #3 | UME Nero⛟ | 412 | 0.14 | 10 min |
| #4 | Pizoler | 217 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #5 | FallenGod | 139 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Greenzombie | +1.93 | 75 | 63 |
| #2 | Samu | +1.27 | 86 | 57 |
| #3 | Pizoler | +0.12 | 54 | 66 |
| #4 | sw3Dreams | -0.81 | 58 | 37 |
| #5 | Sgt. Relice | -0.98 | 64 | 51 |





