








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 3 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 223 matches | ||
| Faceit | 13 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2116 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,708 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2844 | 27% |
| Smokes | 2833 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2624 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2407 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $535,671 of utility $98 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ム | 56% | 18 |
| #2 | ★ ♥ Nσ Rαgє Mαη ♥ ★ | 52% | 23 |
| #3 | ᠌ | 44% | 36 |
| #4 | ツ | 43% | 21 |
| #5 | -JuSko- | 42% | 59 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | -JuSko- | 6 | 0.0053 |
| #2 | SK | 2 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | [M]itraillette.BiH^^ | 1 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | N0RaG3MaN | 1 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | ム | 1 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝕊𝕞𝕦𝕣𝕗𝕖𝕥𝕥𝕖 | 287 | 0.30 | 6 min |
| #2 | SK | 256 | 0.21 | 7 min |
| #3 | ᠌ | 241 | 0.32 | 5 min |
| #4 | N0RaG3MaN | 160 | 0.31 | 3 min |
| #5 | ツ | 131 | 0.29 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ム | +3.30 | 74 | 56 |
| #2 | ᠌ | +2.47 | 70 | 75 |
| #3 | N0RaG3MaN | +1.78 | 73 | 69 |
| #4 | 𝕊𝕞𝕦𝕣𝕗𝕖𝕥𝕥𝕖 | +1.00 | 64 | 74 |
| #5 | ツ | +0.41 | 64 | 75 |





