








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1 achievement has been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 10 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
262 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,350 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 611 | 45% |
| Smokes | 285 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 388 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 66 | 5% |
Our logs show you have wasted $24,974 of utility $47 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #14 | ☺BadPlayers☺ | 25% | 4 |
| #15 | SKel | 25% | 4 |
| #16 | Benjy03™ | 0% | 2 |
| #17 | 2+2 | 0% | 2 |
| #18 | Agelaste | 0% | 2 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LouISe (fr only) | 2 | 0.0039 |
| #2 | [M]itraillette.BiH^^ | 1 | 0.0076 |
| #3 | SKel | 1 | 0.0123 |
| #4 | nkrZwh | 1 | 0.0323 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SK | 73 | 0.28 | 2 min |
| #2 | LouISe (fr only) | 70 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #3 | [M]itraillette.BiH^^ | 16 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #4 | SKel | 13 | 0.16 | 0 min |
| #5 | ム | 9 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Agelaste | +8.36 | 91 | 72 |
| #2 | ム | +7.62 | 75 | 56 |
| #3 | nkrZwh | +6.68 | 47 | 75 |
| #4 | Qdz | +5.56 | 68 | 63 |
| #5 | Pingouin Tripolaire | +3.40 | 86 | 24 |





