








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 8 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 43 matches | ||
| Wingman | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
723 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,286 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 600 | 26% |
| Smokes | 476 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 593 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 617 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $245,163 of utility $105 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 19 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Qrazy | 85% | 13 |
| #2 | Xmple | 67% | 9 |
| #3 | Reenzer™ | 67% | 24 |
| #4 | Ḫ̵͆à̶̈́V̵̾̿̀ơ̴C̸ | 66% | 35 |
| #5 | Jiri11 | 57% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Ḫ̵͆à̶̈́V̵̾̿̀ơ̴C̸ | 66% | 35 |
| #5 | Jiri11 | 57% | 35 |
| #6 | TheDevilsrevenge | 47% | 19 |
| #7 | b0mbushka69 | 45% | 51 |
| #8 | V_JUR | 32% | 47 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jiri11 | 9 | 0.0120 |
| #2 | Ḫ̵͆à̶̈́V̵̾̿̀ơ̴C̸ | 9 | 0.0126 |
| #3 | b0mbushka69 | 7 | 0.0068 |
| #4 | TheDevilsrevenge | 7 | 0.0185 |
| #5 | V_JUR | 2 | 0.0024 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ḫ̵͆à̶̈́V̵̾̿̀ơ̴C̸ | 153 | 0.21 | 6 min |
| #2 | Jiri11 | 87 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #3 | V_JUR | 62 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #4 | b0mbushka69 | 53 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #5 | Reenzer™ | 38 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ḫ̵͆à̶̈́V̵̾̿̀ơ̴C̸ | +7.47 | 92 | 83 |
| #2 | V_JUR | +4.14 | 71 | 58 |
| #3 | Reenzer™ | +3.61 | 69 | 63 |
| #4 | Qrazy | +2.13 | 51 | 45 |
| #5 | Jiri11 | -0.92 | 58 | 59 |





