








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 649 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 634 matches | ||
| Premier | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8347 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 27,873 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6491 | 23% |
| Smokes | 7853 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 5786 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 7743 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,774,624 of utility $109 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 152 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ballemagi | 53% | 59 |
| #2 | OK | 52% | 529 |
| #3 | KRØYER | 51% | 313 |
| #4 | Opoy | 51% | 126 |
| #5 | zlAGs | 47% | 154 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | KRØYER | 51% | 313 |
| #4 | Opoy | 51% | 126 |
| #5 | zlAGs | 47% | 154 |
| #6 | skaevmund | 44% | 161 |
| #7 | CLiBe | 43% | 82 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zlAGs | 10 | 0.0030 |
| #2 | KRØYER | 7 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | Opoy | 6 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | CLiBe | 6 | 0.0035 |
| #5 | OK | 5 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | OK | 1335 | 0.12 | 38 min |
| #2 | KRØYER | 829 | 0.12 | 24 min |
| #3 | skaevmund | 456 | 0.13 | 10 min |
| #4 | zlAGs | 309 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| #5 | Opoy | 230 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | OK | +1.52 | 76 | 69 |
| #2 | Ballemagi | +0.66 | 61 | 56 |
| #3 | zlAGs | +0.05 | 63 | 58 |
| #4 | KRØYER | +0.02 | 59 | 65 |
| #5 | Opoy | -0.52 | 75 | 54 |





