








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 383 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Faceit | 9 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




48 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2485 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,963 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1557 | 20% |
| Smokes | 2416 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1996 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1994 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,187,093 of utility $177 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 208 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | IHaveNoHands69 | 63% | 32 |
| #2 | Swift | 61% | 23 |
| #3 | Corona | 59% | 17 |
| #4 | yung crete | 49% | 49 |
| #5 | Kansil | 46% | 91 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Toji | 31 | 0.0066 |
| #2 | yung crete | 19 | 0.0190 |
| #3 | Kansil | 16 | 0.0087 |
| #4 | uzimode | 8 | 0.0095 |
| #5 | Banshee | 4 | 0.0044 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Toji | 508 | 0.11 | 13 min |
| #2 | Kansil | 278 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #3 | IHaveNoHands69 | 145 | 0.23 | 2 min |
| #4 | yung crete | 101 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #5 | Swift | 79 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Toji | +2.45 | 78 | 62 |
| #2 | IHaveNoHands69 | +1.34 | 62 | 42 |
| #3 | uzimode | +0.47 | 73 | 33 |
| #4 | humble soft spoken white boy | +0.41 | 59 | 49 |
| #5 | Kansil | +0.14 | 71 | 55 |





