








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 587 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 26 matches | ||
| Premier | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2262 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,510 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1577 | 24% |
| Smokes | 1652 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1809 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1472 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $833,329 of utility $190 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 91 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | climbing | 62% | 13 |
| #2 | Abortion Clinic | 62% | 39 |
| #3 | jaMAN | 59% | 76 |
| #4 | foodbag | 57% | 35 |
| #5 | Foldesi | 57% | 58 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dusty | +3.13 | 87 | 56 |
| #2 | Abortion Clinic | +2.28 | 76 | 61 |
| #3 | Smoove97 | +1.18 | 71 | 59 |
| #4 | A True Canadian Hero | +1.05 | 63 | 58 |
| #5 | climbing | +1.04 | 73 | 38 |





