








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 353 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 53 matches | ||
| Premier | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 32 matches | ||
| Faceit | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




27 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2965 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,249 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2885 | 35% |
| Smokes | 2198 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1688 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1478 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $754,981 of utility $150 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 400 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | swan | 60% | 48 |
| #2 | KIEROC | 58% | 65 |
| #3 | Rudzy | 56% | 73 |
| #4 | Egg | 54% | 186 |
| #5 | Iskander | 53% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Egg | 7 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | KIEROC | 4 | 0.0030 |
| #3 | Iskander | 4 | 0.0046 |
| #4 | Rudzy | 3 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | swan | 2 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | swan | +3.16 | 85 | 64 |
| #2 | slapit | +2.39 | 89 | 65 |
| #3 | Egg | +0.94 | 83 | 52 |
| #4 | Rudzy | -0.16 | 78 | 53 |
| #5 | KIEROC | -0.71 | 66 | 55 |





