








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 158 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 133 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2094 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,956 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1374 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1524 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1484 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1574 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $756,402 of utility $130 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 48 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Werty | 60% | 136 |
| #2 | Rippe | 56% | 16 |
| #3 | TseiWili | 53% | 202 |
| #4 | Saunaklonkku | 51% | 243 |
| #5 | gäry | 48% | 77 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Rippe | 56% | 16 |
| #3 | TseiWili | 53% | 202 |
| #4 | Saunaklonkku | 51% | 243 |
| #5 | gäry | 48% | 77 |
| #6 | Taretykki | 34% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TseiWili | 16 | 0.0040 |
| #2 | Saunaklonkku | 11 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | Taretykki | 3 | 0.0053 |
| #4 | gäry | 2 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | Werty | 1 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Saunaklonkku | 827 | 0.17 | 21 min |
| #2 | gäry | 195 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #3 | TseiWili | 186 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| #4 | Werty | 145 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| #5 | Rippe | 60 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TseiWili | +1.98 | 62 | 54 |
| #2 | Saunaklonkku | +1.39 | 55 | 72 |
| #3 | Werty | -0.34 | 51 | 39 |
| #4 | gäry | -0.52 | 26 | 55 |
| #5 | Rippe | -1.92 | 25 | 59 |





