








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 177 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 121 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




33 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1725 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,580 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2003 | 23% |
| Smokes | 2060 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 2578 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 1939 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $563,483 of utility $115 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 100 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ksh1Nx~ | 49% | 45 |
| #2 | Super_Moky | 46% | 198 |
| #3 | Zenuss | 42% | 202 |
| #4 | CoolDude63 | 40% | 121 |
| #5 | DNARetro | 37% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Zenuss | 42% | 202 |
| #4 | CoolDude63 | 40% | 121 |
| #5 | DNARetro | 37% | 19 |
| #6 | whale | 34% | 29 |
| #7 | MissEllie2 | 30% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Super_Moky | 22 | 0.0056 |
| #2 | Zenuss | 12 | 0.0030 |
| #3 | CoolDude63 | 8 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | ksh1Nx~ | 5 | 0.0058 |
| #5 | MissEllie2 | 1 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Super_Moky | 910 | 0.23 | 19 min |
| #2 | Zenuss | 662 | 0.16 | 17 min |
| #3 | CoolDude63 | 253 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #4 | ksh1Nx~ | 91 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #5 | MissEllie2 | 84 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Super_Moky | +3.26 | 75 | 65 |
| #2 | ksh1Nx~ | +2.59 | 82 | 41 |
| #3 | CoolDude63 | +1.26 | 58 | 60 |
| #4 | Soda | -1.22 | 54 | 50 |
| #5 | Zenuss | -1.73 | 41 | 64 |





